I didn't say it was Lunacy..

So, the business we are trying to open here in Hanoi suffered a slight set-back this week. It was due to something completely out of our control but, in retrospect, it probably could have been planned for. It's nobody's fault though, no finger pointing, and no hard feelings. We just made a few changes to our plans and continued on.

Let me explain. When I first got here at the beginning of March, one of the first things I did was to set a tentative date for opening as April 1st. It seemed like a good day to me. The first of the month. It's was a Tuesday, near the beginning of the work week. That would give us plenty of time to make the neccessary preparations, and we could easily be ready by that date. Plans were written, people were called, announcements were made.

Then the unexpected happened. When I arrived at the office on the 28th of March, only days before our doors were supposed to fly open and money was to begin pouring into our pockets, I was met by a very serious group of secretaries all huddled, chattering around a calendar. They were seemingly arguing over who was going to break the bad news to me. They looked at me with grim faces, and then at the calendar, and then at each other, then back at the calendar. The chosen one then emerged from the pack armed with her calendar, and began to explain.

She first showed me something like this. As you can see from that calendar, the 1st of April is clearly not a good day to open or start anything. I mean, what kind of Lunatic would start anything at the end of the moon's cycle? Apparently, the end of the moon cycle brings bad luck. It was explained to me that nothing can be started near the end of the cycle, and that in fact, the 9th of April, which is at the beginning of the new moon cycle, would be a much better day to open our new business. I was at a loss for words. I couldn't really think of a rational argument to counter that logic, so I was beaten. The ninth it is. If the stars aren't aligned then they aren't aligned, right? Who can argue with that?

So our first major minor set back was handled quite easily. But here is a short list of other things of the same nature, which I felt I should immediately learn, so as not to make the same mistake twice.

- If one is going to have a party, one should only gamble after the festivites

- If one is going to sweep the house, one should only sweep near the end of the moon cycle to avoid sweeping out the good luck that the new moon brings

- One should sprinkle lime powder around the house to expel evil

- One should not give a gift of duck, it symbolizes unluckiness (but only on some days, i'm not really sure which, something was lost in translation on that one)

- One should not give a clock or a watch as gifts, it symbolizes that your time is passing

- One shouldn't have shrimp at the start of something (i.e. wedding, ribbon cutting) in case one would move backwards like shrimp, in other words, one would not succeed

- If one should want to give a pet as a gift, one should give a dog, but not a cat. The Vietnamese word for the dog's bark, gâu gâu, sounds like the word giàu which means richness. The word for cat, mèo, is pronounced like nghèo, which means poverty

I think they all sound quite reasonable, and I'm pleased to be able to make the following announcements. Thus far:

- I have only been gambling after parties.

- I haven't swept at all, so all my good luck is still in my house.

- I haven't given anyone any cats, ducks, or watches.

- I'm pretty sure I don't move like a shrimp (but I might need a second opinion on that one)

- In accordance with the moon, which will be waxing cresent, the business will be opening it's doors on April 9th 2008. And the stars will be aligned.